you want recipes?

here be recipes.

you want stories?

no!

How many of you actually read the autobiographies that somehow make it into every f*cking recipe online? How many of you actually care? I’m hungry, I want food.

Yes, I know how to cook

For those skeptical, yes I do know how to cook. I don’t like life stories so quick and dirty:

-Dropped out of Culinary school due to not learning anything, and pursued a better career for myself.

-Have at one point of my life had the title “chef.”

-Cooking is my (slightly) autistic superpower. Website creation is not.

-I hate long winded stories. When I’m in doubt about a new meal, I find a few recipes and take what I like from them to make my own.

-I do have some stories for some of these recipes like Borsche (NSFW), Buttermilk Chicken (Boooring), Chocolate Caramel Coffee Mousse Pie (Married a She-Devil). These stories will not be posted.